早前朋友 send 了一段短片過來. 短片非常有趣搞笑, 跟大家分享一下:

(順帶一提, 字幕用的是英式英文)

I stopped dancing. I wasn't in the disco anymore. I was wearing glasses. I don't wear glasses. My eyes refocused [re = 重新] and for the first time I could see where I was. I was on a stage in front of what, one, two, three...six billion people. I tried to speak. (Hello) But all that came out was this strange shape covered with colours. The mix of colours was giving me a headache and I noticed that the mixed cube moved around. I wonder what intricate (複雜的) mysteries god would reveal (向...啟示) to me if I solved the puzzle. But everytime I moved the cube, it just got more mixed up. until I decided to throw the cube into the air and when I caught it, it was somehow solved on all sides!

I waited for god to reveal his intricate mysteries, but God just said, 'There is no cube. It's all in your head!'

And when I looked back down at my hands, the cube just vanished (消失了). There was a cry from the crowd. Someone shouted out, 'Show us a card trick, wanker [英國粗俗語, 等於學生口中常說的 '弱智仔']!'

(Show us a card trick, wanker!)

I was nervous and my hands began to sweat. Sometimes I sweat a little, sometimes I sweat a lot. Sometimes I sweat out a whole pack of cards, and the box. I looked around the crowd for someone to help me with my 'card trick', I realised that I couldn't see a thing. (Shit!) I do wear glasses. I couldn't remember where I put them, though. So I had to improvise (即時模仿 [= 港澳人說的 '爆肚']), instead. I wandered over to a girl.
'Follow me, I said (Follow me)
'Take a seat,' I said (Take a seat)
'I'm pleased to meet you,' I said (I'm pleased to meet you)
I lied. I explained to her:

(In this box, there are 52 cards. What I'm about to do is just well.)

I decided to speak like an American. People love Americans, they are such good listeners. I continued whispering (輕聲細語) into her ear.

What an idiot! I meant to say, 'Name a card, any card.' I'm rubbish at speaking to pretty girls. I always make them nervous. I think she understood what I meant, though. Because she named a card, anyway. I leaned (傾身) close so that I could hear her.

(Three of Spades.)

She said the Three of Spades. (The Queen of Hearts it is, then!)

I tried to change her mind. It didn't work. Nervously, I opened the case and inside I found something that surprised even me. There was only one card inside the case and when I showed it to the audience, they began to make this noise with their hands for it was the card she freely named--the Three of Spades!

I looked smart and pretended that this coincidence (巧合) was just a part of my act. The girl was so impressed that she wanted to give me a kiss--on the lips--but she didn't. I wanted to take her hand, but it was attached firmly to the end of her arm. So I used it to lead her back to her seat.

I did this in a style of a homosexual (同性戀者). Women love what they can't have. After I walked back to the stage, I realised that I was wearing glasses.

(I don't wear glasses!)

(You! You're always there, shouting out my thoughts!) I said.

(No, you're not there! You're in my head!) I said.

(I know how to get rid of you. Dr. Barns gave me those pills. I've got them just here.)

(Are you looking for these?) You knew I tried this! You stopped me last time. But if you're just in my head, you can't be holding those pills! I have.

(Shit! I didn't take the pills!)

I was silenced, I was paralysed (動彈不得). Then the mind covered me up with a sheet, out of sight, out of mind. I was helpless. There was nothing I could do. I was forced to leave the mind I was controlling alone and I vanished (消失) from his life forever!

(Don't do this.)